An Ode to Tami
by Michael Damianos
This bit is another tool of horsemanship made by the late Bill Stewart. I most recently used it the last few years on a horse named Non Dimenticar J. Truly an odd name, I remember when we first saw the horse and was told the name, I said, “Seriously?” As you will see, that would be prophetic and ironic.
In the early Fall of 2021 I had to abruptly relocate my business from the facility that was home for 31 years to an historic ranch on the east side of Ventura, California. That move is a story for another time, but with any change we often say “goodbye” to things we’ve loved and “hello” to things that will be good for us, even if we don’t realize it at the time.
Tami and Dino in Western Trail at Santa Barbara (Region 2).
I moved 14 horses to the Willow Creek Ranch. There was a number of boarders there that I did not know just as there was at my prior venue. There was one lady in particular that would say, “Hello” and not much else. I only knew her as “Tami” and she had a grey grade horse that she recreationally rode.
Four of Michael’s favorite horses and three of Michael’s favorite ladies. Michael on Pardonn My French+++// (Robby x French Vanilaa), Lee Entrikin on OFW Renoir+// (OFW Magic Wan x OFW Rejoyce), Katie Russell on Chunky Chick+// (Rodan LTD x Chicolena Mac V) and Tami Dance on Non Dimenticar J+ (Marwan Al Shaqab x Unforgettable J).
Turn the clock seven months later and Michael Damianos Performance Horses (MDPH) was off to the Region 2 Championships in Santa Barbara. We had a very good show that year. During the show one of my clients said, "Did you know Tami from the barn was here watching the show?” I replied, “The lady with the grey mare?” “I never saw her, where was she?” My client said, “I talked to her at the arena for at least 30 minutes.”
The following week I saw Tami and said, “I understand you were at the show, why didn't you come by the stalls and say hi to everyone?” Tami replied, "I just wanted to watch your group at a show and see if your customers were having a good time. Now I want to ask you a couple of questions.”
Tami and her barn buddies; Lee, Katie, and Jackie.
Tami went on to say that she had shown in Arabian shows as a youth rider and actually knew who a few my clients were, as they had owned show horses with other trainers when she was younger. She then proceeded to tell me she had been observing us for the last few months leading up to the show. She asked if MDPH was planning on sticking around since she was at a point in her life in which she could return to showing. We had a lengthy conversation about what she wanted in her next horse.
Tami was quite a researcher and she knew what bloodlines were popular and all the specs on the classes she wanted to participate in. I think investigation and research came naturally to her. Her regular job was as an ARTIC (Advanced Real-Time Information Center) Dispatcher. Her unit investigated crimes in progress as the 911 calls came into the dispatch center. Her skills in her regular job became invaluable to her barn friends. If a horse was ill, if someone was trying to find something for their horse, if someone wanted to know the pros and cons of a particular feed, hotel availability at the next show, or anything else Tami would be on her iPad finding the answers. I soon dubbed her, “Madame Research”.
Tami and Dino dragging a log in Ranch Trail in Santa Barbara (Region 2).
That winter Tami and I took a day trip to Becker Stables in Grass Valley, California. Brett Becker showed us a very handsome gelding bred by Larry Jerome of Jerland Farms, Non Dimenticar J, a coming six-year-old that was by Marwan al Shaqab and out of Unforgettable J. Both parents had been National champions at halter. We tried him and he became Tami’s new horse. Brett explained to me that “Non Dimenticar” was an old Nat King Cole song. The title meant “Do Not Forget.” Larry Jerome felt the name was a tribute to the gelding's dam, Unforgettable J.
We called him “Dino” and his first show with us was the Region 1 Championships in Del Mar where he was Champion Performance Halter Gelding and Top Five in Western Pleasure Ladies & Gentlemen to Ride. As with any young horse in their first year of showing he would have some ups and downs, but Tami was steadfast and they finished their first year winning the Western Pleasure ATR Championship at the AHASC Fall Show in Los Angeles.
Tami and Dino competing in an Open Ranch Show against Quarter Horses, and placing third in a large class.
Tami and Dino started the next year by adding some new classes to their repertoire, trail and ranch trail. By Regionals Dino was getting in his trail groove and he won several classes. He did so well I convinced Tami he was ready for a trip to Tulsa. This first year green trail horse went Top Ten at the U.S. Nationals in Western Trail AAOTR, Ranch Trail Open, Ranch Trail ATR and National Reserve Champion in Western Trail ATR Select. Less than two years prior Dino was just saddle broke. I could brag it was my superior skill, but the truth is Tami was a uniquely dedicated client.
I’ve had clients that liked to come to the barn two to three days a week, but I never had a client that was there seven days a week. If she was not at work, she was at the barn. She was totally committed to her horse and relentless in her pursuit to be good. If I said he needed something it was there as soon as possible. She had no siblings, no husband, no children and few close friends - just her horses. Her barn friends respected her dedication and admired her drive.
Tami and Dino winning Reserve Champion in Amateur Select Trail at the 2024 U.S. Nationals in Tulsa, Oklahoma.
British horseman Harry “Breaker” Morant said, “Live every day as if it is going to be your last; for one day you’re sure to be right.” This quote would turn out to be very foretelling. After two great years of Tami, Dino, and MDPH, Tami fell suddenly ill at work and went to the ER. From that point her health rapidly spiraled downhill. She saw specialists and soon she was hospitalized. By late March dear Tami was in hospice at the Ventura County Memorial Hospital. Between her coworkers and her barn mates there was someone with her constantly.
On March 27, 2025 I got a call form Captain Brian of the Ventura County Sheriff's Department. He said, “I understand you are the horse trainer. Tami does not have much time left and all she wants is to see her horses again. Can you bring them to the front of the hospital about 10 am tomorrow. I have people asking the hospital for permission to do this, but if they say “no” we are doing it anyway. Take the Seaward exit and I will have officers looking for you. They will make sure you get the trailer up to the building.”
Tami with Dino in front of Ventura County Memorial Hospital.
On March 28, 2025, my wife and I loaded Dino and Darla (her grade mare) and took them to the large high-rise human hospital in downtown Ventura. There was a moderate crowd and the sheriff’s department made sure everything was in place. At 10:00 two nurses wheeled a very frail Tami to the front entrance of the hospital. She was so weak I had to help her lift her arm to pet her horses. A number of of my clients and staff walked up and eloquently said their goodbyes. Tami appreciated all the love, but was most comforted by the sight of her horses and the sensation of their breath against her face. Dino understood the gravity of the situation. That horse lowered his head, softly blew on his mom and his eyes glared at her with concern and appreciation. I know they were communicating with each other and I know he told her he would not forget her.
The last farewells at Ventura County Memorial Hospital. The officer is Megan Beck, daughter of Arabian breeder Cindy Beck and sister of western pleasure amateur exhibitor Brandi Burroughs.
I found myself at a moment in life where you know you have to say something but the circumstances are so eminent and so dire you are uncertain what to say. I told Tami how sorry everyone was this was happening to her but this moment let her friends and her horses have an opportunity to express directly to you what you mean to all of us. I hope you find comfort in knowing how loved you are and we will find solace one day in knowing you heard us. Tami was wheeled backed to her room and I loaded her two best friends in the trailer and took them home. That was on Friday, she left us to be with the Lord that Sunday.
On June 7, 2025 we held a celebration of life for Tami at Willow Creek Ranch. It was a beautiful day and a fitting tribute to an “unforgettable girl”. This lyric from the song her horse was named after probably best expresses how Tami sees her horses from heaven.
Tami sharing a final moment with Dino in front of Ventura County Memorial Hospital.
“Non dimenticar
Although you travel far, my darling
It's my heart you own, so I'll wait alone
Non dimenticar.”
Dino, Tami and Michael at their first show at Region 1 in 2023, where Dino was named Champion Performance Halter Gelding.
I will never forget “Madame Research” or her horse. “NON DIMENTICAR” or “DO NOT FORGET” will bounce around periodically in my memory forever. RIP TAMARA DANCE
